So… for the past several years October rolls around and the 28th looms like a spider waiting for me to fall asleep so it can crawl all over me until I wake screaming and tearing my hair out. And, then it arrives. Bam. October 28th… And I think about how if she hadn’t died we’d be drinking a lemon drop together or I’d be toasting to her over FaceTime or talking to her on the phone and wishing her a Happy Birthday. But, Melis did die… but, it’s still her birthday… Yes.
And so the 28th thunders into focus. And we just carry on, like we do. As is often the case, at random times throughout the day I think about her and well, you know, I just miss her dumb ass. It’s been a little bit. I have perspective. I’m older. And I know just how lucky I am that I’m older even though I sometimes forget to be grateful for that. I think about how much has time has passed since we had a gab and about how much has changed and how much is still the ding dang same and how I’d love to just talk to her about all of it. I know she’d enjoy my kids and how proud of them she would be and how proud of me she would be for raising good humans. I know she’d be proud of my work. Proud of me.
And so… tonight… sitting at Dodger stadium on the 28th of October with my most generous bestie Gail and her daughter Em and my sweet Oona and watching the Red Sox win the World Series felt truly special. I’m sure it will sound trite to some, or melodramatic to others, and I don’t really care because I felt something ‘special’ in the air. I wasn’t hearing things about corn fields or anything but the atmosphere felt charged and being there with my crew and supporting my Sox felt personal. She and I had gone to so many games over the years and there was something just absolutely divine about being there with all the female energy in our posse, on the 28th of October in Los Angeles, and cheering our team on. The Dodger fans and staff were incredibly kind and classy. It was truly a magical night. So… just sitting here back at home and reflecting on this day, this life, and lifting a glass in the air and looking skyward. Grateful for a lovely evening. Grateful to have loved and been loved by such a special woman and so incredibly happy to have all the women, and men, in my life. And, this October 28th, I wanted to say it… And also, Go Sox… :)